Every Baby?

"Every baby is just like that..." said our pediatrician and many friends. I beg to differ.

Okay, I will admit, I imagined that our baby would be all smiles and barely any tears. Of course, that was an unrealistic fantasy : ) But the screams from BC were not just "normal baby cries." They were different.

I have often heard the generic term "colic" in reference to crying and refluxy babies. Some friends told me that every baby has colic. I began to research what colic really is. Yes, all babies cry, but do all babies really have colic?

According to Mayo Clinic, true colic is:

If your baby cries about the same time each day and nothing you do seems to offer comfort, your baby may have colic. Colic is often defined as crying more than three hours a day, three days a week for more than three weeks in an otherwise well-fed, healthy baby. What is most important for the diagnosis is sustained crying in an otherwise healthy baby for a regular period of the day lasting for several weeks.

That sounded familiar. I kept reading.

Fussing and crying are normal for infants, and a fussy baby doesn't necessarily have colic. In an otherwise healthy, well-fed baby, signs of colic include:

• Predictable crying episodes. A baby who has colic often cries about the same time every day, usually in the late afternoon or evening. Colic episodes may last from a few minutes to three hours or more on any given day. The crying usually begins suddenly and for no clear reason. Your baby may have a bowel movement or pass gas near the end of the colic episode.
• Intense or inconsolable crying. Colic crying is intense and often high pitched. Your baby's face may flush, and he or she is extremely difficult — if not impossible — to comfort.
• Posture changes. Curled up legs, clenched fists and tensed abdominal muscles are common during colic episodes.

I texted my Heroic Husband, "BC is textbook colic."

Inconsolable crying (from 4:00pm until bedtime, every day); intense, high pitched screams (BC's screams actually make your ears ring); flushed face (as in fire hydrant red); nearly impossible to comfort (food and exercise ball sometimes help); curled legs, clenched fists, and a tense, enlarged belly - these fit BC to a "T."

The cause of colic is unknown. Researchers have explored a number of possibilities, including allergies, lactose intolerance, an immature digestive system, maternal anxiety, and differences in the way a baby is fed or comforted. Yet it's still unclear why some babies have colic and others don't.

Without a "reason" behind the colic, I decided to try my best to alleviate as much of BC's anguish as I could.

I knew BC was having some gastric distress. I began researching if the foods I eat effect his digestion. The inquiry was inconclusive. Many say yes, others maybe, some no. Thus, I began to experiment. My Marvelous Mother got me started on the brown rice elimination diet. There are very few people who are allergic to brown rice. For a few days, all I ate was brown rice, steamed  carrots and green beans, and apples. BC still screamed a lot, but HH and I could tell a little difference. BC slept better at night, because he did not have as much gas in his system.

After a few days, I slowly began adding in foods, evaluating them, and either keeping them in my diet, or eliminating them again.

I was worried about lettuce. Romaine is one of my favorite foods. (Believe it or not, I was one of the only two-year olds who would go to a restaurant, ignore the kid's menu, and ask for a side salad with the dressing on the side.) Some of HH's close relatives have Crohn's disease. Leafy greens hurt their stomachs. I hoped BC was not sensitive to greens. Thankfully, he was not.

After much trial and error, I began to make my own list of  foods that I suspected were giving BC trouble.

**Once again, all of the online lists contradict each other. These foods are what do not work for BC and me. Every baby is different; every mother is different.**

 Beans (black-eyed peas have not given any trouble)
*Beets
Berries (blueberries, etc.)
*Celery
Citrus Fruit (grapefruit, pineapple, kiwi)
Cucumber
*Dried Fruit (prunes, dates, etc.)
*Eggs
Grapes
Nuts (peanuts, almonds, etc.)
*Soy Protein Powder (however, soy nuts and soy nut butter seem to be okay)

I am still experimenting with food. Only five foods from my suspect list have continued to effect BC. As his digestive system matures, and he grows, foods that I thought gave him trouble, no longer seem to hurt him. At eight weeks, I am going to try those five really troublesome foods again.

As a mother of a true-blue colicky baby, I want to encourage other mothers. It will get better. Typically, at three to four months colic goes away. At six weeks, there is a huge improvement. For some, it will take longer, others, less time. Do not get frustrated with your baby. They have no idea why they are crying. Comfort them as much as you can. Bouncing on an exercise ball worked wonders for BC. Holding BC in my arms and singing when he would "freak out" did not appear to relieve the anguish he was in, but it let him know I was there, and that I loved him. It is not easy. I wanted to - and did - cry myself. Your husband is a great support. When HH comes home from work, he watches/bounces BC for me while I finally have time to brush my teeth : )

BC is six weeks old now. At four weeks, he changed dramatically. He went from a text-book colicky baby, to a happy, wiggly, smiling baby 95% of the time. He still cries, and he does have "freak-out moments, but they are fewer and farther between.

Although every baby cries, not every baby is colicky. Do your own research, experiment with food, and try to figure out what your baby needs. And most importantly, even at 3:30am, when your baby will not be consoled, continue to praise the Lord for the little blessing in your arms.

Psalms 139:14
I will praise You because I have been remarkably and wonderfully made. Your works are wonderful, and I know this very well.