Who Needs Sleep?

"I'll sleep after the baby is born."

I said that many a time while I was pregnant with BC. Between working at the beginning of my pregnancy, packing in the middle, and settling in to a new home at the end, I really never had time to "rest." I did take naps in the fitness center at my office during the first trimester, but that was about it.

After the baby was here, I realized that once again, sleep was not on the menu. If I took the advice, "sleep when the baby sleeps," I would have slept all day and stayed up all night - and that is not what needed to be done.

For a while, I was just tired... or to be completely honest, exhausted. Being a mom is a full-time job - and being a breastfeeding mom adds even more - and being a breastfeeding mom to a very slow eating newborn who wanted food every two hours (example: start at 2, end at 3:30, ready again at 4), was even more tiring! (At four months, BC still wants food every two hours, but the feeding time has decreased to 30 - 45 minutes.)

And then came the stage where BC's naps were not as easy as 1-2-3. BC decided that the only place to nap was in my arms - which is so sweet, and I loved accommodating him - but there were days, where we just sat on the couch ALL DAY. I knew this could not go on indefinitely. Eventually, even in the middle of the night, the only place BC would sleep was in my lap, which meant even less sleep for momma.

I have read a lot about baby schedules, sleep training, etc. Now, I am personally not a fan of schedules for babies. I love to have a schedule for myself, but as I wrote a few weeks ago, God has used BC to start breaking me from that "need." I feed BC on demand, he naps when he is tired (well, to an extent) - as in he does not have a nap time - he goes to bed when he cannot stay awake any longer, and he wakes up in the morning when he is ready.

I am also not a fan of the infamous "cry it out" method of getting your baby to sleep. I know it works for lots of parents and babies - and if it works for you, hooray! - but that is just not my cup of tea. However, I did need to come up with some kind of sleep training program - starting the day at 4:30am just because BC did not want to be in his bed anymore was not working.

My sweet Heroic Husband hates to hear BC cry. He just cannot bare to hear his son upset (it is really cute when he hands off crying BC to me to calm him down, waits close by, and then swoops up happy BC to play with him : ) However, in order to train BC to put himself sleep, there were going to be some tears. 

The opportunity finally arrived last week while HH was at a Christian summer camp. BC and I went to my Phenomenal Parents' house for the week. The first night, I asked if they could take some rough nights in an attempt to get BC (and me) to sleep better. They graciously agreed. But how should I start?! My Marvelous Mother reminded me of a Fantastic Facebook friend who had posted about her sleep training experience with her son. It had worked for her, so I decided to try it.

Rather than laying BC down and walking away to let him cry himself to sleep, I laid him down, turned on his giraffe sound soother, gave him a pacifier, and placed his favorite giraffe stuffed animal in his little arms. I turned down the lights as he began to wail. Then, I knelt down by the pack-n-play and caressed his head, patted his tummy, talked to him, and sang soothing songs. Although he did not like not being in my lap, he knew he was not being abandoned. He looked up at me with pleading eyes, but I gently told him it was OK, and time to go to sleep.

That first night was rough. It took two hours to get BC to sleep. Then, another two hours after he woke up in the middle of the night for a snack. He eventually did put himself to sleep though.

The next night, only took forty-five minutes - and about fifteen minutes at his middle of the night feeding.

The third night took fifteen minutes - and about five in the middle of the night.

By the end of the week, I was feeling rested for the first time in a long time. Seth was happy. My parents were not being kept up all night. I was skeptical of how BC would transition from my parents' house to my house. The first night in his crib, he slept like a champ. One night, he even slept from 10:30pm to 6:30am solid!

I know that not every night will go as well as others. I know there will be hard naps and nights. But, I also know that my little four month old knows how to put himself to sleep. He can sleep for long stretches of time. He does not have to scream. He is slowly turning into a "civilized" baby.

Proverbs 19:23 The fear of the LORD leads to life, and whoever has it rests satisfied...

Now that our little family is home together again, we are enjoying our new bedtime routine. HH still gives BC his nightly bath. While I nurse BC into dreamland, HH reads to us out of BC's baby Bible (we started this while I was still pregnant). Then, HH and I lay our sweet baby down in his crib, and watch him fall asleep. These little family moments are the best.

Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.